this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It's blow job season.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
