I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
i think i just lost a toe
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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