I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
He did a backflip because drugs
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