2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
you win again, gameday.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
