billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize