this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
