Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
