If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
