belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
