Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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