You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize