So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
