I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
