note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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