So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
