Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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