i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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