FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize