After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
