I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Fuck appropriateness.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
