sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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