i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize
