Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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