She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I believe in your delicious
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
