who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
