If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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