we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
My pussy is not your playground.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize