oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
