just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
