I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
