D3 body, D1 cock
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
When are your genitals available?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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