the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
