i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
