so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
