Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
