I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
