respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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