his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
