She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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