we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
lol hangovers are for mortals.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
