We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize