my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
so let's talk penis.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
my shit smells like andre
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
