When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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