he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
