New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
