whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
