Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
