Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
