Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
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