so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
